Communication

Proper communication requires an open mind. An open mind requires humility. Humility requires one to put aside one's pride. Communication does not mean changing beliefs or convincing another to change their beliefs that is formally called a a debate or informally called arguing. Propper communication is used for understanding, understanding does not mean acceptance. If my child were to communicate a desire for a new car giving all ideas forth of color, style, type of car, etc. I do not need to accept that desire and give them a car especially if he or she is only 4 years old. So often people misunderstand communication as an intent to change minds, or inact change in belief, or request to be given something.

If a husband is walking in a store with his wife sees another woman and states out loud she has a nice butt, well the wife would be offended taking that as his desire to bed her even if in fact it was a simple statement. Communication requires a consideration of purpose. In that case purpose may be a desire to receive confirmation of feelings rather than a desire to have. Its not wrong to desire confirmation nor to have such feelings of what we consider attractive, it is, however, socially unacceptable to state out loud due to how that affects others around us. I may also add innapropriate to dwell on feelings of attraction to the point of having fantasy of obtaining, but we are focusing on communication not thoughts. So consider your purpose when communicating because how it is understood will determine how well you communicate.

Babies communicate based on needs usually through tones of crying depending on the need. Toddlers communicate based on needs and wants beginning with one or two words and later sentences. Children and teenagers communicate needs, wants, feelings, desires, fears, etc. Through full sentences of what they understand. Adults communicate all that prior and then some often using context, examples, parables, imagery, etc in order to bridge gaps in connotative meaning. One example of many words that mean the same thing but used in different geological areas: buggy, shopping cart, grocery basket, etc. One example of a word with multiple meanings based on the  geological area in which it is used is biscuit see UK vs USA.

Text message is notorious for causing miscommunication due to simplicity of messaging and often short text especially without context. Phone calls are the same but are less common of an issue due to tone of voice. Many times someone might send a picture without context and friends dont understand the message, memes bridge that gap. Other times a picture might be sent and the message not understood in the same way. You might send a picture and description of what is in the picture but its not understood or not recieved in the way expected. Lets say you send a picture and a description of what is within, would you consider saying "I have never seen this before and it never crossed my mind that I would ever see this. If I hadnt seen this I'd not think it to be something ever possible, therefore I find it funny." Very clear and consice of a message yet not common use. Especially when the message is generally accepted when sending a picture and simply saying "lol." It seems only when the feeling is not mutual is when the message is not accepted. You share what you think is funny but someone else does not think it so they may find it to be an annoyance.

Sometimes personal feelings are absent in messages as well. Imagine feeling alone, sad, depressed, or any number of negative emotions. Maybe you dont necessarily desire to tell someone your feelings but you went online to find connection. You found a picture you thought was funny and shared it with a friend or to social media as a sort of seeking validation from others. They dont know why you shared it but if they think its funny they may reply with an "lol" or a like. But those who dont have the same feeling ignore it. When you share alot and someone who does not feel a connection to or understanding to the messages or posts they may start to feel annoyed, especially if related to certain topics they disagree with. For example if someone messaged me with constant quotes from a political figure I disagree with I would be very annoyed and communicate as such. In that example they may be sharing those quotes with a certain purpose that is not communicated, such as: maybe they feel the same as you and share them as a way of saying "i find this person stupid" or "i find this funny because of how false it is"; maybe they are sharing as a way of asking, "what do you think of these"; or they may indeed be saying "I know you dont agree but I want you to change your mind based on these statements."

Again communication requires understanding and therefore might require statement of purpose. Lets say I took a picture of my wife and shared on social media saying "look at my beautiful wife." That could come across as bragging, showing off, etc. But if someone didnt agree that she was beautiful they might find my statement stupid but out of respect they understand beauty lies in the eye of the beholder nevertheless they dont appreciate the post as others do. So lets say I expanded on the post by saying:

"I had such a bad day today. Work was -x, y, or z- and I feel emotionally exhausted. I have been loney all day and considering thoughts of -insert negative thoughts here-. I wanted to share this picture of my wife to say that as she walked in the door her smile brought light into my soul and gladness in my heart. I wanted to share this with everyone as an expression of saying she helped me overcome a negative day."

That might be accepted with more positivity than the first way. I believe too often people judge others by assuming they know what is being thought or felt. I also believe too often others are judged as thinking or feeling certain ways that are untrue. How is this resolved? If every post included a background explaining its purpose would it be accepted as such or rejected as being pretentious? Is art not simply shared without explanation, for the purpose that the viewer may experience their own emotions even if different from the artist?

My point is, before getting angry or annoyed maybe ask for clarification of purpose when communication is made. Admittedly I am not perfect in this myself and need to work on it. I hope this post is understood as I am not proofreading nor am I sharing it with someone else prior to posting as I normally might. I am just tired its 2:30am and if I save it as a draft I might not share it at all.

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Communication

Proper communication requires an open mind. An open mind requires humility. Humility requires one to put aside one's pride. Communicatio...